Become Aware of Your Body Language

Sometimes we get so nervous about having to put ourselves “out there” that our posture and expression betray us when we most need to be in control.  Learn to pay attention to your body language, and “Fake It ‘Til You Make It.” If you carry yourself with confidence and openness, chances are you will give off the impression that you are someone worth speaking to, people will approach you, and you’ll soon feel as secure as you seem.  But you MUST make the effort!

• Stand up straight
• Make eye contact
• Shake hands firmly (there’s nothing worse than a wet noodle hand shake)
• DO NOT cross your arms (folding your arms across your chest closes you off and screams please don’t talk to me!)

Conversation 101

Talking to people is probably the hardest part of networking. In the midst of hiding behind my Blackberry, someone did ended up sitting next to me and I had to put away the phone. She was kind enough to break the ice, and I confessed to being at my first food writing event — and that I was incredibly nervous. She looked thoughtful for a moment and then said, “I don’t usually feel comfortable going up to total strangers and talking to them, but here I make myself do it. Just stick to the cocktails and food table, and that’ll always give you something to talk about.”  Even just saying “excuse me” as you reach across someone to pick up a crudite can be a conversation starter!

Other strategies for starting up conversations:

• Listen. So simple yet not done nearly enough. If you’re just waiting for your turn to talk without listening to the conversation, you’ll turn the other person off really fast.
• Ask Questions. By the same token, if you ask people about themselves and engage them in their expertise, they will be thrilled to talk to you.
• Be Funny. Sure, easier said than done, but if you have a knack for making witty comments, put it to good use. Nothing makes people feel at ease like laughing.
• Know Your Spiel. “So, what do you do?” is a question that will come up a lot, and it may sound obvious, but- make sure you have an answer for it!  Even if all you’ve got is what you would like to do, that’s plenty. Why would anyone hire you or even recommend you if you don’t even know what you want to do?

Leave Them Something To Remember

This DOES NOT mean getting trashed and being the girl who climbed onto the cocktail bar and started singing karaoke…  However, having something about you that stands out—a funky business card, a piece of wardrobe that’s a conversation piece (in a good way!) – or even just being friendly and polite —will make potential connections more likely to return your calls.  Also, if you know that a business contact who you want to connect with will be attending the event, familiarize yourself with their work. Doing your homework will give you more to talk with them about, and they’ll feel flattered that you took the time to look them up.

The Follow-Up

When my boyfriend goes to conferences or parties, he brings home piles and piles of business cards. The first thing he does is organize them into a Rolodex for easy future access. Then, while everyone is still fresh in his memory, he writes details about the person right on their card—what company they work with, what project they worked on, something quirky they did. Then he goes one by one and emails each person saying it was great to meet them and that he hopes to keep in touch. The ones that get back to him become business contacts and some have even become friends. Sending out those initial emails is the first step to investing in a relationship that could eventually lead you to a job and get you hired. Getting the cards is the hard part so don’t let you efforts go to waste by not using them. Isn’t that why you’re networking in the first place?

Karma

As they say, you reap what you sow. The networking game isn’t a one-way street. If you make the fabulous impression we are SURE you will, people will also email you and want to keep in touch with you!  Be receptive, and if you hear of an opening or know of a gig that would fit with one of the people you met, then recommend them. You never know who will eventually do the same favor for you!

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