The More Emotional — The More Expensive

Let’s face it: when you are in the throws of a break up, often all reason goes out the window! If possible, Felder urges those who are planning to leave their marriage, to do so before things get so ugly that the couple is no longer on speaking terms.

The truth is, an ugly divorce always costs more.  When couples let their relationship deteriorate to the point of pure hatred and zero communication (FYI-screaming at one another does not count as communication) the more they must rely on and PAY someone else to negotiate on their behalf. Mr. Felder says, “When you say ‘let the lawyers deal with it‘, you are literally pressing a button on the cash register”.

Get Yourself Prepared & Bring a Package to Your Lawyer

Mr. Felder suggests having everything in order before your first meeting with your lawyer is essential for cutting down the time your attorney would otherwise have to spend on collecting the information. Again, remember– time is money! Here’s a list of documents & information that will greatly expedite your lawyers prep time:

• Bring a list of all of your assets (both jointly acquired and those before marriage)
• Bring any prenuptial agreement and all legal paperwork concerning the division of wealth and assets
• Keep a Diary:
  • Record all expenses & money spent
  • Record all conduct and discussions
• Let your lawyer know what you and your spouse have already agreed to

The Upfront Retainer Fee

Expect to give the lawyer who takes your case a retainer to get started.  Depending on the estimated complexity of your divorce and the experience of the lawyer, prepare yourself to have to pay $1,500-$10,000 upfront.  Lawyers draw their hourly rate from this retainer, and if they do not spend all the hours expected on your case, you will get money back.

Prepare Yourself Financially for Life After Divorce

Keep in mind, it’s not just the expense of the actual divorce proceedings that you must prepare yourself for financially, but divorce often also means having to drastically change your lifestyle to afford the cost of living on your own. –Especially in the current economic climate and housing crisis, many couples are finding that they simply can’t afford to get divorced until their financial situation improves.

When kids are involved, parents must also prepare for the expense of maintaining two households.  If one parent does not have an income, or does not have the same earning potential as the other, the couple must continue to work together to figure out how to provide the best for their children.

What to Ask a Lawyer Who You Are Considering Hiring

1. Has he/she ever tried a case in court before?
2. Have they written any conclusions?
3. What do they consider a successful divorce? Ask them to provide examples of such cases they have worked on.
4. Ask for writing samples

By it’s nature, divorce is an emotionally charged process.  However, it seems your best possibility of saving money is to try to keep your cool enough to work out what you can on your own before involving a bunch of lawyers.  You and your soon to be ex may despise each other, but hopefully you can both agree you would rather have your money go to your future and your children than to a bunch of divorce lawyers!  So, if you can, it might be financially worth it to grit your teeth and work it out as best you can without giving the lawyers carte blanche!  After all, why blow your life savings going tit for tat with someone who is leaving your life?!  Keep in mind- the more you save now- the more you’ll have to establish a new, post-divorce future!

Raoul Lionel Felder is perhaps America’s best-known divorce and family lawyer, representing both ordinary citizens and celebrities in over a thousand cases over the past forty years.

Mr. Felder has written seven books and has published numerous articles related to matrimonial law, politics and social issues and has been a television and radio spokesperson, host and moderator. He is listed in New York Law Journal’s 100 Most Powerful Lawyers in America and in all editions of Who’s Who in America and Who’s Who in American Law. For more information contact him at raoulfelder@raoulfelder.com.

| Print

Pages: 1 2