A Bar Mitzvah Blunder?

Last week, Tracy and her husband Joe received an invitation in the mail for the Bar Mitzvah of the son of Joe’s childhood friend Adam.  Joe has not seen or heard from Adam in a good ten years, but none the less, he was touched to be invited to the celebration.  Tracy and Joe sent their regrets – not only are they not close to the family, but the Bar Mitzvah is all the way across the country.

Although Joe reveres his old pal, Tracy told us she is NOT sending a gift to the Bar Mitzvah boy.  She feels that Adam sent the invitation for the sole purpose of soliciting more gifts for his son.  It’s not like Adam even sent a personal note trying to reconnect with Joe on a more personal level…

However, some of us at Fab & Fru disagree with Tracy’s reaction….  Did Adam really only invite them to get a gift for his kid?  Or did he truly hope that Joe and Tracy could make it?  Regardless, are there times when an invitation to a major celebration does NOT require sending a gift – or is Tracy in the right not to send one?

Tell us what you think!

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4 Responses to “A Bar Mitzvah Blunder?”

  1. c says:

    If Joe has not been in touch with Adam in ten years, touched by the invite or not, I don’t feel it is necessary to send a gift. I find it odd that after 10 years of zero communication Adam would have thought to invite Joe.

  2. Darleen says:

    Tracy is wrong and tacky. Send a gift and stop being so darn cheap. Maybe just sending an invite for a gift is something she would do, but it does not necessarily mean Adam would. Adam is most likely very proud of his son and wants all to be part of the celebration. Joe should man up and insist his friend’s son receive a gift from them. If Tracy wants to insult someone, let it be one of her friends!

  3. Bar mitzvah says:

    Hi there

    Hey all gifts are packed. I hope there is one for me too. I loved it.


  4. Simone M says:

    I agree with Darlene,

    It may have been a way for Adam to reconnect with his old friend.
    I don’t think Traci and Joe need to send much, but a small, token check would be a nice gesture to perhaps open up the friendship again.

Any Thoughts?