From Here To Eternity?


Our friend Marci just got engaged to her adorable fella, Joe.  Marci certainly isn’t the bridezilla type, but like most of us, she had pretty specific ideas of what kind of engagement ring she wanted.  Rather than the classic solitaire diamond ring, she expressed to Joe how all she ever wanted was a diamond “eternity band” (gems all the way around) when they got engaged.

Fast forward to the big reveal.  After an idyllic picnic and stroll through the botanical gardens, Joe got down on one knee and proposed.  As he opened the lid of the ring box, the light glistened off what looked to be the eternity band of Marci’s dreams.  That is, until he slipped the sparkler on her finger, and she realized the diamonds only went half way around – a sort of a semi eternity band

Marci was so disappointed, but didn’t want to ruin the moment.  She told Joe how much she loved the ring, and the two toasted their future together with a glass of bubbly.  But now, a week later, Marci’s wondering if it’s okay to say something to her future husband…

Is Marci acting petty and ungrateful if she suggests they exchange the ring for a full eternity band?  Or should she just learn to be happy with the ring Joe chose?  Would you speak up in this situation?  Tell us what you think!

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7 Responses to “From Here To Eternity?”

  1. Bethany says:

    I would speak up. But not for a few more weeks. Who knows, the one she has night grow on her? But I would just say ‘You know, I love this ring, but it’s starting to bother me that the diamonds don’t go all the way around. Could we go see what it would cost to make that happen?’ That way he doesn’t feel like he failed at getting a ring, but she still gets what she wants. You’re going to be wearing the thing for the rest of forever, you better get what you want!

  2. s says:

    yes, u have to let him know from the start your taste. my husband proposed to me and at first i said no cus i didnt think we were ready. then i mulled it over a good nights sleep and asked that he ask me again and that i wanted a different ring. it was hideous! I had told him from the jump if you ever think about going ring shopping take one my sisters or mother along cus they know my taste. i guess he wanted to pick something on his own-but he chose wrong. he later exchanged it for an updated glamous ring. and i love it and him. so yes tell him!!

  3. carol says:

    I wouldn’t say anything. Maybe Joe couldn’t afford the eternity band. Marci can always upgrade the ring in the future, possibly for an anniversary.

  4. Jiminy Drambuie says:

    I believe that Joe was probably the victim of a sales person. I am deeply familiar with fine Jewelers and have more than a few very close personal and family friends in the business. When people come in for eternity bands – they usually try to talk them out of it — and into the “semi”. This is usually for 2 reasons: 1) for the same budget, they are getting usually larger and better quality diamonds that will actually be “seen.” 2) Many women actually modify their eternity bands within a year or so. Often, unless the diamonds are channel-set, it is very uncomfortable for many women as they go about their day to have the diamonds on the inside of the hand. It also is often impractical, as the diamonds often scrape items that the women are handling, and tend to pull and snag on fabrics.

    Therefore, sales people will often try to caveat and talk buyers out of this setting, as they inevitably see these customers again for ring modifications, etc. Marci should be appreciative that she has a thoughtful man who was doing his best to accommodate her desires. But, most men go with the experts when it comes to diamonds.

  5. louie says:

    Is getting engaged all about the ring or getting proposed to by the right guy? Learn to Love it Baby !!! I’ll bet it wasn’t that Joe simply didn’t listen to Your request and preference, but simply couldn’t afford it and therefore did the best he could. If you plan the marriage to take place and hopefully last, there will be many more pieces of jewelry to come. Learn to receive graciously and from the heart. It actually works.

  6. Simone says:

    I think that everyone here has a valid point.
    As Louis said, maybe Joe couldn’t afford one w/ diamonds that go all around. But then Jiminy made a good point too – perhaps the price was the same, but Joe selected larger diamonds because the salesperson made him realize that many women who think they want an eternity band really don’t because the diamonds on the bottom may snag clothing, get scratched or loosen up.

    My thoughts are to be honest. Marci should tell Joe how thrilled she is, and praise his good taste, but then be honest that she was really hoping for an eternity band. I think it should be an open honest discussion. Yes, Louis you’re right, there will be other pieces of jewelry to come, however, this is the forever one, and Marci should have the one of her dreams.

  7. Ranee says:

    I think that Marci should stop the control and greed now and learn to be gracious. Her guy choose from his heart…there in lies the beauty. I say Joe run, run now and run fast. Who needs a selfish and spoiled materialist wife??? These traits will only get worse with time. I would want to spend my life with someone who loved me enough to see the beauty in my expression of love.

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