Our friend Kate just went on a second date with Ron.  Like the first date, it was SO much fun.  And like the first date, Ron insisted on paying for dinner.  Kate thanked him and told him she would only agree if he let her leave the tip…

As soon as Kate put down the cash for the tip, Ron told her she had left too much.  Kate told him she always leaves 20%.  Ron said he did too.  The confusion was soon alleviated when they realized that while Kate leaves 20% on the whole bill – including tax – Ron always tipped 20% on the PRE-TAX amount.

To Kate, this was actually the tipping point – she thought it was so cheap of Ron to tip on the pre-tax amount that her excitement level about him went down …by at least 20%!

So, what do you think? Is it ok to tip on the pre-tax amount – or only on the full bill?  Is Ron cheap …or just frugal? 

Single Living on a Shoestring

Going through a breakup or looking to ditch the roommates for your very own place?  Living alone is an exciting adventure, but it certainly is not the most wallet friendly living situation.  However, even in these trying economic times, more singles are opting to live by themselves than ever before…

According to Eric Klinenberg’s book, Going Solo: The Extraordinary Rise and Surprising Appeal of Living Alone, only 22 percent of adults were single in 1950, and only 9 percent of those single lived alone.  But today… almost half of the country’s adults are single, and one in seven households are occupied by solo dwellers!  So if you want your independence, how do you prepare financially to be live solo in the city?

The 25% Rule

Most experts say that your monthly rent or mortgage should never exceed twenty-five percent of your monthly paycheck.  If you are savvy enough find an apartment that meets this criteria, and budget your other expenses well, you should be able to live quite comfortably while having the funds to steadily increase your savings account too.  Clearly the 25% rule is tougher to stick to in a major city like New York or LA!

The Singles’ Penalty

You don’t need to be a rocket scientist to know that your household expenses will increase when you move out on your own.  When you’re planning out your monthly budget, remember to consider all the bills that you are used to splitting – or not paying at all.  Many of these expenses are optional, so tally it all up and cut the amenities you can live without.  And if you’re renting… Try to get your landlord to include utilities like: gas, electric, water, and cable!

• Electricity (don’t forget the big AC bump in the summer)
• Gas
• Water
• Cable
• Phone & Internet
• Renter’s or Home Owner’s Insurance
• Condo, Co-op or Association Fees
• Property Tax & City Fees
• Repairs
• Groceries -(The price per person is higher when your just buying for one).
• Housekeeper

Amy and Ed’s daughter Christina is enrolled in one of the poshest private schools in town.  With tuition pushing $25,000 per year, it’s a small fortune – but they agree it’s worth it.  One thing they don’t agree on?  What kind of extra donation – if any – they should make to the school…

Amy feels it’s understood that each family is expected to donate something extra, while Ed feels strongly that he’s paying his dues at $25,000.  And even though they could technically afford to donate, he refuses.  With the school’s annual fundraiser around the corner, they have been feuding again about what – if anything – to give.

In the interest of their daughter and their relationship to the school, is Ed being foolish not to give an extra donation?  Or is Amy just preoccupied with keeping up appearances?  What would you do?  Tell us what you think!

by Stephanie Berenbaum – May 10, 2012

Did You Know…

President Obama’s landmark support of same-sex marriage this week (coupled with North Carolina’s decision to make it and civil unions illegal) really got us thinking.  Though we’ve always been supporters of same-sex marriage, we realized we were pretty ignorant of the financial implications of being a gay couple – even if you are married in a state where gay marriage is legal (Connecticut, Iowa, Massachusetts, New Hampshire, New York, Vermont & Washington D.C.)  Here’s a brief look at some of the issues unfairly affecting homosexual couples ….and their finances!

DOMA

DOMA is the “Defense of Marriage Act” – signed into federal law in 1996 by that noted defender of “traditional” marriage – Bill Clinton – believe it or not... DOMA states that for federal purposes, only heterosexual marriage is legally recognized.  So, even if you live in a state where gay marriage is legal, financial complications arise for gay couples when it comes to benefits that fall under the jurisdiction of the federal government.  And you thought YOUR taxes were complicated!

Federal vs State Taxes

Let’s say, for example, you are a gay married couple living in New York State.  Even though you can file your taxes jointly at the state level, you still need to file separately at the federal level.  So, for your state return you are married, but for your federal return you’re NOT.  Not only does this result in additional tax preparation fees for the couple,  there are many federal tax benefits and deductions that heterosexual couples receive that are not available to homosexual couples.  Check out this link from the Family Equality Council for more info!

Health Benefits

I have to admit, I had no idea about the disparity in taxation of health benefits between heterosexual and homosexual couples.  According to the Family Equality Council, “LGBT families with health benefits have higher taxable wages. If LGBT families receive family health benefits from an employer, they pay federal tax on the value of those benefits, even if the employer provides them at no cost.  Married heterosexual families receive these same benefits tax-free.” 

For years, Julianne has gotten her morning coffee from this adorable European style cafe around the corner from her office.  She’s friendly with the owner, and all the baristas know her by name.  The one problem… the cafe doesn’t offer coffee cards for their regulars, and they never reward their patrons with anything on the house.

Mind you, Julianne has never thought twice about any of this – that is until a new chain opened up across the street.  On a whim, she went into the new coffee house to try out their morning brew.  Not only did their coffee rival her favorite morning cup-o-joe, but it was 15 cents cheaper, and with a coffee card, every 10th cup was free.

A total loyalist by nature, Julianne felt horrible that she cheated on the cafe – and liked it. The last thing she would want is for them to go out of business as a result of the new competition.  For a few extra pennies, should Juliane continue to support her favorite shop, or should she save those pennies and leave it up to her friends to compete with the realities of good customer service and the nature of capitalism?

What would you do?  Tell us what you think!

Fab & Fru-nique Mother’s Day Presents

Don’t have a lot of money to spend on mom?  So what!  That’s no excuse for giving a boring Mother’s Day Gift.  If you think having “only” $20 bucks to spend means a another Target gift card tucked in with your Hallmark Card – THINK AGAIN.  In honor of May being Small Business Month, here are our favorite Fab & Fru gift ideas – all under $50 and all from small – but FAB – businesses!

For The Gourmet Mom:  Modern Bite

You’ve never seen cookies like these before!  For $30 you can give mom the most fabulous, modern designed “tile” cookies (see main photo) – and they taste as good as they look!  These tres chic sweets not only come individually wrapped – they are also packaged in a gorgeous gift box. Everyone we know who has tried Modern Bite is hooked …including us!

For The Artsy Mom:  Xenia Taler Picture Frames and Tiles

Speaking of tiles…We’ve written about our love for Xenia Taler handmade tiles before – and just in time for Mother’s Day they announced they are having a 20% off sale on their handmade tile photo frames – which means their $62 frames are now down to just under $50!

For The Letter-Writing Lady: Monkey Business Stationary

We love the letterpress stationary offerings from Monkey Business Press.  For $40, AHAlife is currently offering an exclusive “Here’s To You Mom!” boxed set of their 60s chic “bottles and glasses” blank notes with a huge added bonus – this hilarious “fill in the blank” card for you to give mom – which is a gift in itself…  If mom still insists on hand writing thank you notes (as we all should, by the way) this is the gift for her!

For The One-Of-A-Kind Mom:  Hooray For LaLa on Etsy

Leslie Robinson’s ETSY store, “Hooray For LaLa” is truly a treasure trove of, well….treasures!  She has compiled a fantasy land of one-of-a kind vintage finds to fit any budget.  Our favorite for mom?  This delightful mosaic brooch – at only $16 mom will think you spent way more!

Fab & Fru salutes all the small businesses out there for providing us with BIG gift ideas! 

Our friend Marci just got engaged to her adorable fella, Joe.  Marci certainly isn’t the bridezilla type, but like most of us, she had pretty specific ideas of what kind of engagement ring she wanted.  Rather than the classic solitaire diamond ring, she expressed to Joe how all she ever wanted was a diamond “eternity band” (gems all the way around) when they got engaged.

Fast forward to the big reveal.  After an idyllic picnic and stroll through the botanical gardens, Joe got down on one knee and proposed.  As he opened the lid of the ring box, the light glistened off what looked to be the eternity band of Marci’s dreams.  That is, until he slipped the sparkler on her finger, and she realized the diamonds only went half way around – a sort of a semi eternity band…

Marci was so disappointed, but didn’t want to ruin the moment.  She told Joe how much she loved the ring, and the two toasted their future together with a glass of bubbly.  But now, a week later, Marci’s wondering if it’s okay to say something to her future husband…

Is Marci acting petty and ungrateful if she suggests they exchange the ring for a full eternity band?  Or should she just learn to be happy with the ring Joe chose?  Would you speak up in this situation?  Tell us what you think!

From Mad Cows to Mortgages!

Costco Mortgages

Multitaskers: Rejoice! You can finally purchase a home AND shop for bulk containers of sweet pickles – all at the same time. Yes – you can now obtain a mortgage through Costco.  No word yet on if they are offering free bulk containers of Kleenex for those of us still weeping about money lost in the ongoing housing crisis.

A Mad Cow

A deceased dairy cow in California tested positive for Mad Cow disease this week.  And while we don’t think this one Cali cow will have the same effect on the beef industry as Oprah did a few years back, there is likely to be an economic hit to the industry any time the words “Mad Cow” are “uddered.” - Sorry, I just couldn’t resist….

Sex, Lies, and Videotape

John Edwards is back in the news – the former trial attorney and presidential hopeful is on trial himself. Edwards is accused of  misusing political donations from wealthy backers to pay for the care and housing of his pregnant mistress, former campaign videographer Rielle Hunter. Which, like so many news stories, begs the question: why can’t these guys just keep it in their pants?

The Obamas’ Student Loans

The political battle over student loans isn’t going away. Last Friday, the White House threatened to veto a bill to keep interest rates on a popular kind of loan from doubling come July 1, and Republican candidate Romney also agreed.   President Obama said in a speech this week that he and Michelle only finished paying off their student loans 8 years ago, and he wants to strive to keep that money in recent graduates pockets.  The problem: where is the government going to make up the difference?

How was your week?

by – Brandi Savitt – April 26, 2012

Teaching Self Esteem, not Entitlement

Last week, I had the misfortune of dealing with a colleague who asked for a promotion for a job she was simply too inexperienced to handle.  The ultimate problem was her demanding nature, and that her entitled tone (backed by no experience or strategy) offended many people involved in the account. The icing on the cake?  She was totally oblivious to the drama she had caused to the project and her team, and therefore could not bring herself to understand the consequences or take responsibility for her actions…

Cut to the chase: her ego and sense of entitlement were so extreme, she ultimately was let go! It got me thinking – how can you stop this sort of behavior from forming before it costs you your job?!

Don’t Blame Generation Y

While 20-somethings battle with the repercussions of being given the label “The Entitled Generation”, it is up to all of us to consider that maybe it isn’t the fault of the “kids today” at all, but rather the result of the lessons taught (or not taught) at home…so we talked to some seasoned educators and super grandmas for the scoop on how to teach our kids a strong sense of self without teaching them to expect to be handed the world on a silver platter.

The Gift of Self Esteem

You can tell a child all day long how fantastic and special they are, but if they never get a chance to prove it to themselves, they will never feel that sense of empowerment everyone needs to develop a strong sense of self.  The problem comes when kids get a gold star for everything (at school and at home) – even when it’s not deserved.

There is a fine line between trying to protect a child’s feelings and giving them a false sense of self.  A seemingly inflated ego can be a direct result of a child who is actually insecure and who never learned the value of accomplishment.

Taking Ownership

One of the best ways to teach your children responsibility is to teach them the value of money at an early age.  If your child is old enough to want an expensive toy, let them contribute to it’s purchase.  Perhaps they take on an extra job around the house, or strive to reach a new goal at school.  If they have to work hard to get something they want, it will mean more – and teach them to take ownership and responsibility in all aspects of life..

Being Accountable…

The next humbling lesson is to teach your children is to be accountable for their actions.  If a child throws her new toy against the wall and it breaks – guess what – the toy doesn’t magically get replaced to keep her from crying.   Learning the consequences of our actions and being able to admit when we made a mistake is a major factor in achieving future success.  After all, we all make mistakes – it’s how we own up to and fix them that really matters.

–Ultimately, my colleague’s entitled attitude lost her her job and several important references.  So, while your kids should be the center of your universe, make sure they know they are not literally the center of THE universe! 

by Stephanie Berenbaum – April 25, 2012

Go Green & Save Money with LunchSkins

My sons’ school has been doing a great job encouraging parents to pack “no waste” lunches for the kids.  No waste meaning: no paper napkins, no disposable utensils and absolutely no plastic sandwich bags!

And while I am all for the Green movement – it has taken a lot of trial and error to find eco-friendly products that I would actually recommend to friends and Fab & Fru readers.  After experimenting – a lot – I found a baggie alternative I love:  LunchSkins!  And what’s even more Fab & Fru?  They are now available at TARGET!  Now you really have no excuse.

Dollars & Eco-Sense

In addition to protecting the environment, LunchSkins  also protect your wallet.  For example, Ziploc sandwich bags run about $4.50 for 100, and Ziploc’s snack bags run about $3.90.  Assuming you are constantly replenishing your supply like most moms I know, you’re probably dropping at least $100 a year on plastic bags.  Instead, the next time you are at Target, pick up a LunchSkins two bag pack (snack and sandwich bag) for $10.99 and reuse them hundreds of times.  — Or you can buy snack, sub and sandwich bags directly from the LunchSkin site  for between $8-$11 dollars each.

Don’t Be A Landfill Loser

Here’s the scoop – the moms who founded the company were shocked to hear that 20 million plastic sandwich bags – A DAY – were going into landfills from school lunches.  So they designed LunchSkins to be even better than a regular old baggie.

LunchSkins are made from a thick cotton fabric that is coated with a food-safe polyurethane liner – which contains NO BPA, lead, or phthalates!  LunchSkins are also grease proof and moisture proof making them ideal for messy sandwiches and snacks (is there any other kind of snack?)  And they’re easy to clean and dishwasher safe.  Plus, I love their modern designs!  Seriously, what more can a girl ask for?  I highly recommend investing in these fun, eco-friendly lunch bags.  Cutting back on waste and saving money = totally Fab & Fru!